Divining Humanity

Seek The Essense Of Humanity


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THE SELF And CREATING VALUE

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A Person’s Value DOES NOT Come From His/Her ACCOMPLISHMENTS

Women are actually experts at detecting this, especially in men.  They can understand how a man feels about himself, regardless of how much he has or has not accomplished…

But think about it… who really wants a “success” person, who feels horrible about himself / herself?  Such people are miserable and are miserable to be around.

Really, we need to stop thinking that we need to “earn” value.  Value comes when a person has a deep sense of being “right” with himself / herself, with the universe (or God, if you will).

Value based on “success” is fickle.  As long as a person feels “successful” he or she feels valuable.  But my experience has taught me, that feeling “successful” all too quickly wears off.  And soon, I’ve found myself having the need to again “prove” my ability to be “successful.”

Intrinsic value is Powerful.  Circumstances cannot destroy it.

And Granted – People who feel intrinsically valuable often are successful… but even when they are no longer feeling the effects of a recent success, their feelings of value are unaltered.

In fact, even in the worst conditions, they STILL feel valuable.

Because their Strength come from WITHIN and not from Without.

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Permanently Changing Your Way Of BEING Is Extremely Hard!

It IS possible to change, “who you are…”

BUT I takes an ENORMOUS amount of work!

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Currently, I’m trying to regain my “take me as I am,” attitude I used to have, while upgrading my social awareness.

(in essence, I’ve always wanted to become better and better at social awareness, but I believe until recently I had been unaware of vital information to allow me to do so…)

I’m convinced that there are two sets of “rules”…

  •  The rules we are told and taught…
  • The rules that actually are applicable to society

Over the past month or so, I’ve been studying to learn about the latter set of rules…

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Unfortunately, Ihave found, that knowledge of these rules is not enough.

Even a thorough understanding is ineffective…

What is needed is the application of these rules, in my everyday living!

AND It’s very difficult to change the way that I’ve been acting and change the way that I’ve been thinking…

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BUT I must keep my eyes on the prize!

I want a HAPPY ENDING 😀

I keep reminding myself about this goal and I try to move closer to learning how to create the most enriching social relationships possible, the ones that I’ve always dreamed about, and finding as much joy in living as possible!

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It’s a difficult path. Change ALWAYS Is.  There are some impediments.

  • Natural resistance to change (even if we don’t get the results we want there is a strong tendency (inertia) to continue doing what we have always done…)
  • Self-doubt (Real change is often a solitary process – the vast majority of people don’t want to put in the huge but necessary investment needed to change the way the they think… But even the ones who start down the path of change face discouragement soon after some of the “fruits of their labor” start to be evident in their lives.)

Doubt is very strong! When start to recognize the signs that something different is happening (we are (finally) receiving different results).  There are “voices” in our heads telling us that the “changes” we have seen in our life are simply

    • Illusions
    • Anomalies
    • A result of random chance (not behavior change)

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I guess what I want to tell everyone, is that WE ALL Can Be Better!

But You Need To Really, Really, Really Want It – You Got To FIGHT For It!

(You Might Require Guidance – In The Form Of Real Straight-Talk)

And You Need To Play Up The Littlest Perceived Results In Your Mind…

because DOUBT WILL INEVITABLY creep in!


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THE PATH To Freedom And Inner Peace

The HARDEST lesson to learn is that the world won’t change for you!

The hardest LESSON to learn is that the world won’t change for you!

The hardest lesson to LEARN is that the world won’t change for you!

The hardest lesson to learn is that the WORLD won’t change for you!

The hardest lesson to learn is that the world WON’T CHANGE for you!

The hardest lesson to learn is that the world won’t change FOR YOU!

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The Boy And The Viper

There was once a young boy.  He was a normal boy, curious, playful, optimistic.  One day when he was playing, he happened upon a viper.  He had never seen a snake before in his life, so curiously he approached.  He walked up to the snake as non-threateningly as possible, palm open fingers wide to show his friendly intent.

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But suddenly the viper shot towards his hand and protruded it’s fangs and bit deeply into the boy’s hand…

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In this story, you really cannot fault the boy.  He is inexperienced; he doesn’t see the danger that the viper represents.

But how many of us (By “us” I include myself), make similar mistakes in our daily lives.  Yet, we should really know better!  Sometimes I think we take the “Golden Rule” too far.  (“Do to others as you want them to do to you.”)  And actually it’s because we are too egocentric.  We think to ourselves, what would I do, if someone did this to me.

We make a mistakes of Making Ourselves Innocent.  And just like the boy, we reach out a curious friendly hand, but are Shocked when the viper bites.

Just think about it.  Think about what other people do to make you upset.  They lie and say things you don’t like… they do things that you don’t like.

BUT how often to we ACTUALLY look at other people and evaluate THEIR Nature?  How often do we look at someone else and see if they have an aggressive, greedy, or dangerous nature?
I think the problem is too often we see others as “just like me,” and not for who they really are.

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Now when a viper bites, should we really harbor resentment against the viper.  Vipers naturally don’t trust humans.  They see us as a threat.  The bite the viper gave the boy… wasn’t personal… it was just instinct!

But too often we treat others who “harm” us in life like this.  We think that it’s personal…

“He did that to hurt me!!!”

Then we leave the situation poisoned by bitterness, anger, hurt, which sometimes festers and becomes hatred.

And how often do we make the foolish mistake of reaching out to the viper again, only to allow it to increase on the harm already done?

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I don’t want to seem to advocate never being nice to anyone, but only to not expect others to react just like you.  If it’s in your nature to be kind and give to others, do it… but only a little bit and see the reaction.

Maybe if the boy got outside of himself and his own feelings, he might see the telltale signs of inherent danger in the viper’s behavior as he stepped towards the snake.

Then he might have adverted the bite and wouldn’t have been harmed in any way…